I honestly think I am the most difficult person to be with. I will choose school before you. You might leave but my education won’t. I will choose work over you. I need to pay for my education and my apartment. I’m such a jealous person. I over think too much. I feel like the last few people I’ve been with have not gotten over their ex’s before being with me and that fucks everything up. I feel like I put everything I could in and they didn’t. Like things will come before you and there are some things that have to. And you just don’t get it. I am upfront with how things are going to be and it still bites me in the ass.
I’m pretty done. I’m too difficult to be with or I smoke or I don’t drive there enough or I’m too tall or I’m not thin enough. I feel like I’m never enough for them or I’m too difficult or a combination.
I don’t know what to do anymore.
I’m just gonna take sleepy medicine and go to sleep.